A few quotes from this most magnificent book.
"But it wasn't just that she'd found an audience for her monologues of illness. I firmly believed that if I had picked up a rifle and gone on a murdering rampage, I would have still had the benefit of her unblinking love. Because I had rid her heart of its gravest malady, I had relieved her of the greatest fear of every Afghan mother: that no honorable khastegar would ask for her daughter's hand. That her daughter would age alone, husbandless, childless. Every woman needed a husband. Even if he did silence the song in her."
"...I suspected every bearded man who stared at me to be a Talib killer, sent by Assef. Two things compounded my fears: There are a lot of bearded men in Peshawar, and everybody stares."
"...I wondered if that was how forgiveness budded, not with the fanfare of epiphany, but with pain gathering its things, packing up, and slipping away unannounced in the middle of the night."
"It was only a smile, nothing more. It didn't make everything all right. It didn't make anything all right. Only a smile. A tiny thing. A leaf in the woods, shaking in the wake of a startled bird's flight.
But I'll take it.
With open arms.
Because when spring comes, it melts the snow one flake at a time, and maybe I just witnessed the first flake melting.
...
I ran."
11.2.09
10.2.09
a whispered yes
stunning sometimes to ponder
that all my future knowing
and all my future doing
will be a knowing-with and doing-for;
that you love me enough,
and love me yet,
to whisper me a Yes with your life.
-- john piper
that all my future knowing
and all my future doing
will be a knowing-with and doing-for;
that you love me enough,
and love me yet,
to whisper me a Yes with your life.
-- john piper
20.1.09
some highs and lows of 2008...
HIGH:
- gold cord at convocation.
- meeting lisa bromley.
- coming home in the biggest way ever.
- finding the kind of family that goes beyond bloodlines and straight into your lungs and your heart.
- JAB meeting in Carstairs.
- resolving conflict with dee-bot.
- learning to trust God for provision.
- ryan and jackie matchett.
- having deep friends to talk and walk out the hardest season of my life with.
- restoration.
- being friends with stephen and jessica barbour.
- tessa ella.
- jimmy rea.
- brenna applegate.
- GRAD RECITAL.
- finding out that i'm my brother's people.
- new bible
- first ever bridesmaid gig.
- painting
- scott and holly erickson and seattle.
- ... this list is really long.
LOW:
- not having enough money to buy groceries.
- gas prices (a high in their own way...)
- experiencing humility. or the process of there becoming.
- crappy news about married friends.
- my ankle still hurts.
- waking up at 5 am far too much.
- fighting with dee-bot.
- crappy mentoring situation.
- ... everything has its perspective so this list is a little bit harder.
- gold cord at convocation.
- meeting lisa bromley.
- coming home in the biggest way ever.
- finding the kind of family that goes beyond bloodlines and straight into your lungs and your heart.
- JAB meeting in Carstairs.
- resolving conflict with dee-bot.
- learning to trust God for provision.
- ryan and jackie matchett.
- having deep friends to talk and walk out the hardest season of my life with.
- restoration.
- being friends with stephen and jessica barbour.
- tessa ella.
- jimmy rea.
- brenna applegate.
- GRAD RECITAL.
- finding out that i'm my brother's people.
- new bible
- first ever bridesmaid gig.
- painting
- scott and holly erickson and seattle.
- ... this list is really long.
LOW:
- not having enough money to buy groceries.
- gas prices (a high in their own way...)
- experiencing humility. or the process of there becoming.
- crappy news about married friends.
- my ankle still hurts.
- waking up at 5 am far too much.
- fighting with dee-bot.
- crappy mentoring situation.
- ... everything has its perspective so this list is a little bit harder.
30.12.08
wisdom a la starbucks!
"the irony of commitment is that it's deeply liberating -- in work, in play, in love. the act frees you from the tyranny of your internal critic, from the fear that likes to dress itself up and parade around as rational hesitation. to commit is to remove your head as the barrier to your life."
-- #76, anne morriss, sbux customer.
"mother-love is not inevitable. the good mother is a great artist ever creating beauty out of chaos."
-- #36, alice randall, novelist.
"on the battlefield of ideas, winning requires moving toward the sound of the guns."
-- #290, new gingrich.
"do not kiss your children so they will kiss you back but so they will kiss their children, and their children's children."
-- #27, noah benShea.
"if you've got a dollar and you spend twenty-nine cents on a loaf of bread, you've got seventy-one cents left. but if you've got seventeen grand and you spend twenty-nine cents on a loaf of bread, you've still got seventeen grand. there's a math lesson for you."
-- #112, Steve Martin
-- #76, anne morriss, sbux customer.
"mother-love is not inevitable. the good mother is a great artist ever creating beauty out of chaos."
-- #36, alice randall, novelist.
"on the battlefield of ideas, winning requires moving toward the sound of the guns."
-- #290, new gingrich.
"do not kiss your children so they will kiss you back but so they will kiss their children, and their children's children."
-- #27, noah benShea.
"if you've got a dollar and you spend twenty-nine cents on a loaf of bread, you've got seventy-one cents left. but if you've got seventeen grand and you spend twenty-nine cents on a loaf of bread, you've still got seventeen grand. there's a math lesson for you."
-- #112, Steve Martin
14.9.08
one body fest
oooh boy.
so we've been planning this festival for months. september 12...it echoed in our minds and our day planners (or diaries) -- we couldn't get away from it.
what would happen?
would students show up? would they find a church? would churches show up?
we asked dozens upon dozens of questions, except...
will it rain?
will it pour and wind and be freezing cold?
answer: yes.
all the plans of mice and men...do go awry.
so we've been planning this festival for months. september 12...it echoed in our minds and our day planners (or diaries) -- we couldn't get away from it.
what would happen?
would students show up? would they find a church? would churches show up?
we asked dozens upon dozens of questions, except...
will it rain?
will it pour and wind and be freezing cold?
answer: yes.
all the plans of mice and men...do go awry.
11.9.08
My friend Brenda.
1 John 5:13-15 (The Message)
"My purpose in writing is simply this: that you who believe in God's Son will know beyond the shadow of a doubt that you have eternal life, the reality and not the illusion. And how bold and free we then become in his presence, freely asking according to his will, sure that he's listening. And if we're confident that he's listening, we know that what we've asked for is as good as ours."
My friend Brenda Wilchowy (the Pas, Manitoba) has this quoted on her blog. She's going on an 11-month adventure around the world with an organization called "Adventures in Missions".
She and I did our dts together, and became friends over our mutual love of cheesecake. I had the overwhelming and awesome opportunity to see her ever-too-briefly last summer (2007), and I must say that I love her to pieces.
Her blog is a great place to find out more about what she's doing -- I'm pretty excited for her.
I've just been talking with a friend about uncertainty in life, and for me, I am certainly uncertain. I am in Lethbridge, because I know felt that God was asking me to stay here, and it was quite a journey just coming to terms with that. I woke up this morning, amazed that this is where I live -- some days, I really miss home. Some days, I really want to get married. Some days, I want to quit my job and work at the church. Some days, I want to stay in bed. And some days, I am just so absolutely certain that this is where I should be -- something within me believes that this confidence doesn't need to be as shaky as it is.
"My purpose in writing is simply this: that you who believe in God's Son will know beyond the shadow of a doubt that you have eternal life, the reality and not the illusion. And how bold and free we then become in his presence, freely asking according to his will, sure that he's listening. And if we're confident that he's listening, we know that what we've asked for is as good as ours."
My friend Brenda Wilchowy (the Pas, Manitoba) has this quoted on her blog. She's going on an 11-month adventure around the world with an organization called "Adventures in Missions".
She and I did our dts together, and became friends over our mutual love of cheesecake. I had the overwhelming and awesome opportunity to see her ever-too-briefly last summer (2007), and I must say that I love her to pieces.
Her blog is a great place to find out more about what she's doing -- I'm pretty excited for her.
I've just been talking with a friend about uncertainty in life, and for me, I am certainly uncertain. I am in Lethbridge, because I know felt that God was asking me to stay here, and it was quite a journey just coming to terms with that. I woke up this morning, amazed that this is where I live -- some days, I really miss home. Some days, I really want to get married. Some days, I want to quit my job and work at the church. Some days, I want to stay in bed. And some days, I am just so absolutely certain that this is where I should be -- something within me believes that this confidence doesn't need to be as shaky as it is.
i have decided something.
i am becoming an artist.
perhaps you thought that i already was one -- perhaps you are right. what i mean, though, is that i am changing the way i think about myself. i will now think, when i get up each day, "I AM AN ARTIST".
not really, but it is something that i will be exploring more. i've realized that i love to paint! it's such a beautiful, satisfying and challenging way to indulge my love of all things visual.
i just finished an 8' x 12' painting for an event that several churches in Lethbridge are taking part in. it's called one body fest and the idea is that if we are the church, the body, the bride of Christ, and there are new students entering our city each year who come from churches...we should be welcoming them! so we're going to try and do that. there's a lot more to it, obviously, and there's a sense of urgency in it, because so many people leave the church and let go of faith in these young adult years.
we want to see that statistic change, not so we can keep butts in pews, but so that we can together discover the truest meaning of the gospel...
again, more to that than i was preparing to type right now.
here is the painting in 3 stages -- i'm thinking that i'll get prints made of it so that ya'll can have a copy of your very own.
perhaps you thought that i already was one -- perhaps you are right. what i mean, though, is that i am changing the way i think about myself. i will now think, when i get up each day, "I AM AN ARTIST".
not really, but it is something that i will be exploring more. i've realized that i love to paint! it's such a beautiful, satisfying and challenging way to indulge my love of all things visual.
i just finished an 8' x 12' painting for an event that several churches in Lethbridge are taking part in. it's called one body fest and the idea is that if we are the church, the body, the bride of Christ, and there are new students entering our city each year who come from churches...we should be welcoming them! so we're going to try and do that. there's a lot more to it, obviously, and there's a sense of urgency in it, because so many people leave the church and let go of faith in these young adult years.
we want to see that statistic change, not so we can keep butts in pews, but so that we can together discover the truest meaning of the gospel...
again, more to that than i was preparing to type right now.
here is the painting in 3 stages -- i'm thinking that i'll get prints made of it so that ya'll can have a copy of your very own.
28.8.08
everybody got hitched.
lynnae + dan
rachel + mike
melinda + vancouver
...
melinda + lethbridge
ok, so i'm not married to a city but i did make it back home safely.
sarah mcmaster is moving here soon, so i'm gonna try and hook her up with some starbucks-style employment.
i, in the meantime, am figuring out some things about life.
like why do I do what I do not want to do? What's up with that? At least I know I am not alone.
this weekend i got to spend a day at keats, in the rain, which was lovely.
got me thinking about marriage when i saw a married friend, whose friendship was so valuable to me when we were both single. i got wondering if his vow to commit to his wife and forsake all others has to do with why he and i aren't really friends anymore.
i also got to see my beautiful friend anna vandas play at an art gallery, located in someone's home! it's stunning, she was stunning...
a lot of stunnn going on.
22.8.08
today.
today i am going to a wedding.
well, 2 wedding receptions.
lynnae + dan are getting married at the Cardston Temple, and then the party begins.
I'm kind of excited.
It's a chilly day here in Lethbridge, so my outfit has been modified so I don't freeze all day.
Should be fun.
well, 2 wedding receptions.
lynnae + dan are getting married at the Cardston Temple, and then the party begins.
I'm kind of excited.
It's a chilly day here in Lethbridge, so my outfit has been modified so I don't freeze all day.
Should be fun.
5.8.08
hello moto...?
i never knew there could be a low calorie cell phone plan. how exciting.
my mom is almost done making me this really pretty green plaid jacket -- it's gonna be amazzzzzzzzzing. you'll love it, i promise.
i went to the beach yesterday and today -- got caught up on all the tanning i missed when it was kinda cold and rainy. phew.
it's almost time to go back to lethbridge -- parting is always bittersweet. if only my 2 worlds could collide...i'd be really happy. REALLY happy. seriously, truly, deeply, madly happy. so...let's see what we can do.
also, that way, i could go swimming in the flowers' pool everyday...and who wouldn't want to go swimming everyday?
this is a little bit random...
here is a picture of me in my new lulu that my mom bought. go mom!!
my mom is almost done making me this really pretty green plaid jacket -- it's gonna be amazzzzzzzzzing. you'll love it, i promise.
i went to the beach yesterday and today -- got caught up on all the tanning i missed when it was kinda cold and rainy. phew.
it's almost time to go back to lethbridge -- parting is always bittersweet. if only my 2 worlds could collide...i'd be really happy. REALLY happy. seriously, truly, deeply, madly happy. so...let's see what we can do.
also, that way, i could go swimming in the flowers' pool everyday...and who wouldn't want to go swimming everyday?
this is a little bit random...
here is a picture of me in my new lulu that my mom bought. go mom!!
10.7.08
facebook has taken me away...
ahhh!!
facebook.com has taken me away from my beloved blog. probably a good thing though...a little less emo and a little more creepin' on long-lost friends' photo albums.
woot.
TONIGHT my beloved young adults' group had a bbq at park lake, just outside lethbridge.
SO GREAT!! A LAKE!! It's a little gross, and kinda smells like cow poo...BUT I could go swimming, and there was more or less a beach, so I was happy.
And we had a fire and s'mores and it was pretty dang epic.
oh, and darrell is home from the philippines.
YEAH!
29.3.08
11.3.08
news.
the good news is...I've been spending less time on the internet, more time interacting face-to-face with the world.
the bad news is...this has meant significantly less blogging for you readers. SO, if you are still here...well done.
My graduation rectial is this Saturday, March 15, @ 4.30pm!! How exciting, I know.
Other than that....I haven't been focussed on much. But, plans are moving forward for living in Lethbridge next year, working a bit with bridges of hope, and just generally embracing the incredible, revolutionary life I've found here.
and now...some pictures of reading week in Vancouver. It should quickly be obvious why I love the colour blue...
the bad news is...this has meant significantly less blogging for you readers. SO, if you are still here...well done.
My graduation rectial is this Saturday, March 15, @ 4.30pm!! How exciting, I know.
Other than that....I haven't been focussed on much. But, plans are moving forward for living in Lethbridge next year, working a bit with bridges of hope, and just generally embracing the incredible, revolutionary life I've found here.
and now...some pictures of reading week in Vancouver. It should quickly be obvious why I love the colour blue...
1.2.08
* drive star *
HOLLERRR!
I just got home from work, and I need to relate to you the story of my shift this morning.
OK, so not a full story, just a few fun facts.
I started @ 7am, and deanna graciously lent me her car so I could drive to work -- woohooo!!! That was great.
I arrived 5 mins early, signed in, was good to go, set up my tills...and then the GONG SHOW set in.
I ended up on drive-thru, and I took my first few orders just fine, working off of the 5 minute drive-thru training I had the other day.
Suddenly, it was out of control. I had 8 orders in a row, wasn't sure how many I could ring in and have stored on the computer at once, and I just thought that I was falling apart.
!!!!
FORTUNATELY, I was working with Brittany and Abby, who are fabulously cool-headed, and they helped me to remain calm and work through our drink orders. UNFORTUNATELY, the cafe was also hella busy, so....there was no relief.
Jen came in too, as the gong show was slowing down (ONLY slightly), and she and I pro-star'd the drive-thru together.
Phew.
It was.................a test of stamina, but I passed! Hooorah!
I just got home from work, and I need to relate to you the story of my shift this morning.
OK, so not a full story, just a few fun facts.
I started @ 7am, and deanna graciously lent me her car so I could drive to work -- woohooo!!! That was great.
I arrived 5 mins early, signed in, was good to go, set up my tills...and then the GONG SHOW set in.
I ended up on drive-thru, and I took my first few orders just fine, working off of the 5 minute drive-thru training I had the other day.
Suddenly, it was out of control. I had 8 orders in a row, wasn't sure how many I could ring in and have stored on the computer at once, and I just thought that I was falling apart.
!!!!
FORTUNATELY, I was working with Brittany and Abby, who are fabulously cool-headed, and they helped me to remain calm and work through our drink orders. UNFORTUNATELY, the cafe was also hella busy, so....there was no relief.
Jen came in too, as the gong show was slowing down (ONLY slightly), and she and I pro-star'd the drive-thru together.
Phew.
It was.................a test of stamina, but I passed! Hooorah!
31.1.08
it's not minus 40 anymore!!!
it's been minus forty (degrees centigrade) all week...and today it is minus 5!!!!
WOOHOO!!!
I am delighted, I must say, because this cold and I are not meant to be together.
oh, and welcome to the blog of 2008. the absense has been good, but it's time to return.
hello world!
WOOHOO!!!
I am delighted, I must say, because this cold and I are not meant to be together.
oh, and welcome to the blog of 2008. the absense has been good, but it's time to return.
hello world!
25.11.07
housewives...
oh my! lynnette, bree, susan, and gabrielle! It is great to be reunited!
:)
I must say, the drama on desparate housewives is so fabulou s-- not quite as out of control as your average soap opera, but still scandalous enough to be a guilty pleasure.
Fabulous-o.
again, unrelated pictures:
THIS IS my beautiful sister and her friend Taushif.
Jonathon. Beautiful man.
Bentalls. Best faces ever.
"Oh...I wish I was a punk rocker with flowers in my hair..."
I like to dance, and I like to sing! Do-do-do-do-do!
:)
I must say, the drama on desparate housewives is so fabulou s-- not quite as out of control as your average soap opera, but still scandalous enough to be a guilty pleasure.
Fabulous-o.
again, unrelated pictures:
THIS IS my beautiful sister and her friend Taushif.
Jonathon. Beautiful man.
Bentalls. Best faces ever.
"Oh...I wish I was a punk rocker with flowers in my hair..."
I like to dance, and I like to sing! Do-do-do-do-do!
24.11.07
hollerrrrrrrrrr.
Sooooooo today in computer science there were a handful of people who DIDN'T SHUT UP for the entire 50 minute class. 50 minutes of lecture + dumbass classmates. GAH!!!!
Ew.
Top 3 reasons why I didn't like high school:
1. people talking in class.
2. I used to sweat a lot.
3. cafeterias.
In other news, I need 5 programs, 1 masterclass, and 6 songs to complete the studio component of my semester. AH!
Also, my hair looked pretty fabulous tonight. And also, I've been re-rocking the red Old Navy jacket I bought in fall 2002. It's pretty hot.
Here are some unrelated photos:
me in my garage fridge.
my fabulous friend ife.
this is anna. isn't she gorgeous?
my sister elizabeth. all grown up AND she plays violin.
my blue room in the land below sea.
Ew.
Top 3 reasons why I didn't like high school:
1. people talking in class.
2. I used to sweat a lot.
3. cafeterias.
In other news, I need 5 programs, 1 masterclass, and 6 songs to complete the studio component of my semester. AH!
Also, my hair looked pretty fabulous tonight. And also, I've been re-rocking the red Old Navy jacket I bought in fall 2002. It's pretty hot.
Here are some unrelated photos:
me in my garage fridge.
my fabulous friend ife.
this is anna. isn't she gorgeous?
my sister elizabeth. all grown up AND she plays violin.
my blue room in the land below sea.
12.11.07
sur le weekend...
Friday
I brought my camera to our opera concert (Girls' Night Out) and the batteries died. The only picture I got was this:
Dee and Tyson also left me this little love note (they had their own batteries):
(We Heart Melinda)
(MUMPS!! [U of L is in the midst of an outbreak]).
Saturday
Shannon, Lynnae, and I drove up to Calgary to see 'Across the Universe' and Verdi's 'Rigoletto'.
Sunday
I drove myself to church in Crystal's car.
Mary-ann and I had lunch at her house, then we headed to the mall where I bought some awesome new jeans.
I brought my camera to our opera concert (Girls' Night Out) and the batteries died. The only picture I got was this:
Dee and Tyson also left me this little love note (they had their own batteries):
(We Heart Melinda)
(MUMPS!! [U of L is in the midst of an outbreak]).
Saturday
Shannon, Lynnae, and I drove up to Calgary to see 'Across the Universe' and Verdi's 'Rigoletto'.
Sunday
I drove myself to church in Crystal's car.
Mary-ann and I had lunch at her house, then we headed to the mall where I bought some awesome new jeans.
7.11.07
thinking about the world...
Nobel prizewinner, Gabriella Mistral, put it this way:
“We are guilty of many errors and many faults but our worst crime is abandoning the children, neglecting the fountain of life. Many of the things we need can wait. The child cannot. Right now is the time his bones are being formed, his blood is being made, and his senses are being developed. To him we cannot answer 'Tomorrow.' His name is 'Today.' It's time to respond to the millions of helpless children who are homeless, exploited, and abandoned.”
“We are guilty of many errors and many faults but our worst crime is abandoning the children, neglecting the fountain of life. Many of the things we need can wait. The child cannot. Right now is the time his bones are being formed, his blood is being made, and his senses are being developed. To him we cannot answer 'Tomorrow.' His name is 'Today.' It's time to respond to the millions of helpless children who are homeless, exploited, and abandoned.”
3.11.07
I made a website!
As a computer science 1000 student, I've been required to make a website with a program called dreamweaver.
It's pretty amazing.
Prepared to be changed.
It's pretty amazing.
Prepared to be changed.
