Sometimes love is a choice we make, to be Jesus' hands and feet to another person, because our own hands wouldn't do it.
Each person here has been created, with a purpose, and a breath of life to get them on their feet. We have to shout it out, that this is who they are!
THIS IS WHO YOU ARE!!!
No one's inheritance is divorce, or drug addiction. Abuse, neglect, unkindness, hatred, condescention--none of these things are what you were supposed to receive.
Instead, relentless grace. Boundless love. Mercy. Life.
Rock Garden's over for the year. After discussion last night, there's a bit of what I'm left to think over.
And one final question: what is something another person can do for you that brings you delight, and joy?
31.5.04
25.5.04
all hail america!
Sometimes we make fun of americans because they don't know squat about us (read: Rick Mercer).
Sometimes it's because they are so materialistic (read: Extreme Makeover).
Or perhaps because they like weird music (read: Britney Spears).
But once in a while, something is said or done that brings all the banter to a screeching silence, and gives cause for concern.
(In reference to the on-camera executioners of American contractor, Nicholas Berg, beheaded by Islamic militants in Iraq.)
"They are not to be respected, they are not to be protected, they are not to be understood. They are to be eliminated."
-- Rush Limbaugh
Sometimes it's because they are so materialistic (read: Extreme Makeover).
Or perhaps because they like weird music (read: Britney Spears).
But once in a while, something is said or done that brings all the banter to a screeching silence, and gives cause for concern.
(In reference to the on-camera executioners of American contractor, Nicholas Berg, beheaded by Islamic militants in Iraq.)
"They are not to be respected, they are not to be protected, they are not to be understood. They are to be eliminated."
-- Rush Limbaugh
happy birthday to me!
this is a picture I really like.
Today was a day when I did not work, scooping ice cream. Instead, I went to bed only...19 hours ago, and upon waking this afternoon, I treated myself to fulfilling some wants!
WANTS FOR MUSIC. Here's what I ended up with:
Radiohead--hail to the thief
Mogwai--happy songs for happy people
Waking LIfe--soundtrack
Hayden~Elk--Lake Serenade
Sigur Ros--()
Jamie Cullum--twentysomething
MMMmmmmM!!!! So many good things to put into my headphones!
Today was a day when I did not work, scooping ice cream. Instead, I went to bed only...19 hours ago, and upon waking this afternoon, I treated myself to fulfilling some wants!
WANTS FOR MUSIC. Here's what I ended up with:
Radiohead--hail to the thief
Mogwai--happy songs for happy people
Waking LIfe--soundtrack
Hayden~Elk--Lake Serenade
Sigur Ros--()
Jamie Cullum--twentysomething
MMMmmmmM!!!! So many good things to put into my headphones!
24.5.04
i wish i was as cool as that guy over there
this morning, i got into bed as the sun was coming up.
yes.
the sun came up...as i went to sleep.
yes.
the sun came up...as i went to sleep.
23.5.04
waking life?
I saw part of Waking Life tonight.
A great movie...one that I must watch several times more, if only to catch with some degree of comprehension the dialogue...
It's all sort of rambling, and yet making sense; the kind of discussion I think I can have...it's certainly what goes on in my head...everything disjointed, but abstractly connected. The jumble that happens when the thoughts zinging around inside your head make their way out in an excited heap of brainpower and wonder.
We're all sort of stuck, figuring out this race as we go along. We know how to run, but the ground is always changing: mud, grass, cement, loose dirt, dry dirt, spongy undergrowth, sand...sometimes, even water is found underfoot.
Man. I don't know if this could be any of you out there, but I've always wanted a friend I could just call at anytime: day/night/inbetween, and just talk. More pointedly, have conversation. Or just company. Like TV best friends, who come into each other's rooms via the window, and talk about everything...
I dunno. I got the ice cream shop job. And a nice pair of shin splints to go along with it!
woo-woot!
to bed now, I must retire. Read 'the outsiders' again, or for the first time. It's got some golden moments.
much love,
A great movie...one that I must watch several times more, if only to catch with some degree of comprehension the dialogue...
It's all sort of rambling, and yet making sense; the kind of discussion I think I can have...it's certainly what goes on in my head...everything disjointed, but abstractly connected. The jumble that happens when the thoughts zinging around inside your head make their way out in an excited heap of brainpower and wonder.
We're all sort of stuck, figuring out this race as we go along. We know how to run, but the ground is always changing: mud, grass, cement, loose dirt, dry dirt, spongy undergrowth, sand...sometimes, even water is found underfoot.
Man. I don't know if this could be any of you out there, but I've always wanted a friend I could just call at anytime: day/night/inbetween, and just talk. More pointedly, have conversation. Or just company. Like TV best friends, who come into each other's rooms via the window, and talk about everything...
I dunno. I got the ice cream shop job. And a nice pair of shin splints to go along with it!
woo-woot!
to bed now, I must retire. Read 'the outsiders' again, or for the first time. It's got some golden moments.
much love,
21.5.04
arachnids
it's freakin' spiderscrawlingallovermyhouse season!!
ARGH!
I can't handle it!
I hate it when spiderscrawlallovermyhouse!!!
THey're just so...fast...and small...and have SO many freakin' babies...
even Charlotte's web would not be welcome HERE!
(in my barn, had I one, she could spin a web forever).
ARGH!
I can't handle it!
I hate it when spiderscrawlallovermyhouse!!!
THey're just so...fast...and small...and have SO many freakin' babies...
even Charlotte's web would not be welcome HERE!
(in my barn, had I one, she could spin a web forever).
20.5.04
i wish i was six again.
Too many archie comics spoil the brain.
As will too many episodes of nip/tuck.
I watched 2.
I wasn't sure if I was still a human being by the end of the second one. It has, however, turned me off plastic surgery. So that's...good news...I guess.
The other thing it's taught me is that fat girls on tv are crazy. And if she doesn't get what she wants, she'll shoot herself.
Or this one did.
That...was...depressing.
I don't think I'll watch tv anymore.
As will too many episodes of nip/tuck.
I watched 2.
I wasn't sure if I was still a human being by the end of the second one. It has, however, turned me off plastic surgery. So that's...good news...I guess.
The other thing it's taught me is that fat girls on tv are crazy. And if she doesn't get what she wants, she'll shoot herself.
Or this one did.
That...was...depressing.
I don't think I'll watch tv anymore.
18.5.04
LifeNetwork.ca :: Articles :: Tattoo
PIERCE IT!
" Consider the “Prince Albert,” named after its most famous owner, Queen Victoria’s husband. In the early 1800s, popular men’s fashion was all about really tight pants. In order to avoid unsightly bulges, men would have a ring pierced in their penis which they could then latch onto a hook inside the pants. It was the only time in history when “pants-ing” was not funny at all.. "
Just...there's nothing...I can't...I just don't...I....I gotta go!
" Consider the “Prince Albert,” named after its most famous owner, Queen Victoria’s husband. In the early 1800s, popular men’s fashion was all about really tight pants. In order to avoid unsightly bulges, men would have a ring pierced in their penis which they could then latch onto a hook inside the pants. It was the only time in history when “pants-ing” was not funny at all.. "
Just...there's nothing...I can't...I just don't...I....I gotta go!
early morning archies
Did you ever wonder what Reggie Mantle does in his spare time?
Because he's RARELY in the Archie stories. Even when it's a group of characters, it's usually Archie, Jughead, Veronica, and Betty. Reggie's really just a side character, a thorn in Archie's side (and a rose in Veronica's), but we don't know much about his life. We've never even seen his house or his parents!
At my house, Archie (a strange word to type) and his friends are EVERYWHERE...so I will continue my research into the life of Reggie.
Oh! There are other side characters, but not many solo ones. Dilton has science, Moose and Midge, Chuck and Nancy have each other...but Reggie...well I guess he has himself. (Wait, I made a mistake. While we haven't seen ALL of Reggie's house, we have seen his room, where he is often found gazing into a mirror).
Because he's RARELY in the Archie stories. Even when it's a group of characters, it's usually Archie, Jughead, Veronica, and Betty. Reggie's really just a side character, a thorn in Archie's side (and a rose in Veronica's), but we don't know much about his life. We've never even seen his house or his parents!
At my house, Archie (a strange word to type) and his friends are EVERYWHERE...so I will continue my research into the life of Reggie.
Oh! There are other side characters, but not many solo ones. Dilton has science, Moose and Midge, Chuck and Nancy have each other...but Reggie...well I guess he has himself. (Wait, I made a mistake. While we haven't seen ALL of Reggie's house, we have seen his room, where he is often found gazing into a mirror).
17.5.04
i'm 22!
I was checking my email when I realized that it was 11.46pm, and only 14 minutes of birthday left!
So I will use it to post. Postapostaposta.
birthday has been good. lots of peace felt today (and a little sadness with a phone call from my beloved J.bent down in Australia). Yes, peace. Even in the midst of a rocky congregational meeting.
Heaps of thought about God's provision, and provision of GUIDANCE. Then Rikk blew the roof off tonight, just...I don't even know one thing he said to sum up all that he said.
And so, I am 22. It is official. I have a little bit of new stuff, which is always nice. I have a new appreciation for good friends, the lifeblood of the heart. I am confident that Jesus' death was not in vain, and that the Lord has been, and will continue to be faithful to me.
Through another day, another trial,
another chance to reconcile to one who sees past all I see.
Reaching out my weary hand, I pray that you'd understand, you're the only one who's faithful to me.
That's the kind of Sunday it's been. Goodnight y'all.
So I will use it to post. Postapostaposta.
birthday has been good. lots of peace felt today (and a little sadness with a phone call from my beloved J.bent down in Australia). Yes, peace. Even in the midst of a rocky congregational meeting.
Heaps of thought about God's provision, and provision of GUIDANCE. Then Rikk blew the roof off tonight, just...I don't even know one thing he said to sum up all that he said.
And so, I am 22. It is official. I have a little bit of new stuff, which is always nice. I have a new appreciation for good friends, the lifeblood of the heart. I am confident that Jesus' death was not in vain, and that the Lord has been, and will continue to be faithful to me.
Through another day, another trial,
another chance to reconcile to one who sees past all I see.
Reaching out my weary hand, I pray that you'd understand, you're the only one who's faithful to me.
That's the kind of Sunday it's been. Goodnight y'all.
12.5.04
new blogger....weird
My friend dave is starting this underground christian zine. I'm promised to give him some art/writing next week. Actually, I promised to give him as much as I can.
Kind of feeling insecure about that. I mean, I draw a lot during worship, and at church, or just for fun, but...aiiya! He's such a cool guy, film-maker, just really...cool.
That's silly, though. He's got to be the least judgemental person I know. On the contrary, he's so gentle and kind. He's married to my friend anna, and together...wow. They blow me away.
okay. Well. That's a wrap. Good times. Goooooooooooooood times.
jo's on drugs.
Kind of feeling insecure about that. I mean, I draw a lot during worship, and at church, or just for fun, but...aiiya! He's such a cool guy, film-maker, just really...cool.
That's silly, though. He's got to be the least judgemental person I know. On the contrary, he's so gentle and kind. He's married to my friend anna, and together...wow. They blow me away.
okay. Well. That's a wrap. Good times. Goooooooooooooood times.
jo's on drugs.
11.5.04
The Blog.
AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!
I NEED VISINE!
AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!
[also: come to my partaaay on saturdaaay. it will be funaaaay. @ 7pm aaaaay.]
I NEED VISINE!
AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!
[also: come to my partaaay on saturdaaay. it will be funaaaay. @ 7pm aaaaay.]
9.5.04
i wish i was six again.
Back to that whole 'surrender' thing.
A few years back, I used to play baseball. I wasn't queen of the game, but I was pretty good. I could hit it out of the field when the connection was right, caught my share of high flies and grounders, and even pitched a no-hitter [inning].
However, my team was a group of insecure girls, and not unlike the cliched mean girls of tv and movies, they had a victim...me. They wouldn't play catch with me to warm-up, they rolled their eyes and snarled when I got up to pitch, they insulted me [whispers only], wouldn't let me sit on the bench while we were @ bat...all kinds of good stuff like that. I stuck with it for about 5 years, but then I had to get out.
Why?!
Because at one year-end party, my youngest sister became their victim when they chased her out of the diamond with handfulls of rocks. I think I quit the next year actually, because after than incident, MAN did they ever suck up to me.
*sighs*
Surrender.
Right now that means for me, giving up ALL the baseball stories. It means forgiving those things, and leaving them forgiven. Not trying to dredge up old emotions to get sympathy, or just to tell a story. It means leaving that behind, and allowing the wounds to heal. In recent months, I've wondered if that could even mean friendship or at least a conversation with one of the girls.
It's by grace we have been saved through faith, not from ourselves. It's a gift, not by works, so that nobody can brag about it. I think it's by grace that I can write this, and begin to understand this kind of surrender. Begin to grasp how wide, how long, how deep the love of God. Deep enough to forgive. Deep enough to heal. Deep enough to allow me to love my enemies.
Crazy, right?
Well. That's surrender for now.
A few years back, I used to play baseball. I wasn't queen of the game, but I was pretty good. I could hit it out of the field when the connection was right, caught my share of high flies and grounders, and even pitched a no-hitter [inning].
However, my team was a group of insecure girls, and not unlike the cliched mean girls of tv and movies, they had a victim...me. They wouldn't play catch with me to warm-up, they rolled their eyes and snarled when I got up to pitch, they insulted me [whispers only], wouldn't let me sit on the bench while we were @ bat...all kinds of good stuff like that. I stuck with it for about 5 years, but then I had to get out.
Why?!
Because at one year-end party, my youngest sister became their victim when they chased her out of the diamond with handfulls of rocks. I think I quit the next year actually, because after than incident, MAN did they ever suck up to me.
*sighs*
Surrender.
Right now that means for me, giving up ALL the baseball stories. It means forgiving those things, and leaving them forgiven. Not trying to dredge up old emotions to get sympathy, or just to tell a story. It means leaving that behind, and allowing the wounds to heal. In recent months, I've wondered if that could even mean friendship or at least a conversation with one of the girls.
It's by grace we have been saved through faith, not from ourselves. It's a gift, not by works, so that nobody can brag about it. I think it's by grace that I can write this, and begin to understand this kind of surrender. Begin to grasp how wide, how long, how deep the love of God. Deep enough to forgive. Deep enough to heal. Deep enough to allow me to love my enemies.
Crazy, right?
Well. That's surrender for now.
8.5.04
I have a friend who's become well acquainted with Mr.Daniels and his friend Kahlua, since the dawn of his 19th birthday. That, combined with our radically different schedules, has led to a certain...distance.
But tonight, he arrived where I was, put his stuff down, walked over and hugged me. Huge. Bear-hug.
So...good. It's nice to be reminded why you love a person.
But tonight, he arrived where I was, put his stuff down, walked over and hugged me. Huge. Bear-hug.
So...good. It's nice to be reminded why you love a person.
7.5.04
There's a new email service open for blogger.com users...gmail!
Oooh...
I already have 4 email addy's though. I don't know that I need another one.
I'm going to get a new driver's license this morning. *ahem*...this afternoon. I haven't seen morning the light side of morning for a long while.
what does the word "surrender" mean to you? Beyond the hostage setting, I mean.
Go ahead. COMMENT! I'll give my answer in the next post.
Oooh...
I already have 4 email addy's though. I don't know that I need another one.
I'm going to get a new driver's license this morning. *ahem*...this afternoon. I haven't seen morning the light side of morning for a long while.
what does the word "surrender" mean to you? Beyond the hostage setting, I mean.
Go ahead. COMMENT! I'll give my answer in the next post.
snot stew
My birthday is coming. I'll soon be 22. party party party party coming...come on ride the train.
My aunt gives me strange presents. Hairbrushes, candles, long underwear...sometimes books. Sometimes weird books...weird books like SNOT STEW by ... oh, just kidding no author for ya. I guess I got rid of the book.
ANYWAY...Snot Stew is written with a kitten as the narrator. A farm kitten. This farm kitten ends up living in a house where there are 2 children. When the children fight,
"IS NOT!"
"IS TOO!"
"IS NOT!"
"IS TOO!"
"ISNOT!"
"ISTOO!"
"iSNOT!"
"iSTOO!"
.....
"S'NOT!"
"S'TOO!"
=
SNOT STEW!!!
So the cat hears the fighting at dinner, and thinks that the delicious aromas he's smelling must be...SNOT STEW!!!
gross.
Also, the cat gets his tail bitten off by a mean dog.
Iccchy.
As I said, it was a weird book. Especially for children.
tunes: DC Talk--Jesus Freak. (almost old skool).
My aunt gives me strange presents. Hairbrushes, candles, long underwear...sometimes books. Sometimes weird books...weird books like SNOT STEW by ... oh, just kidding no author for ya. I guess I got rid of the book.
ANYWAY...Snot Stew is written with a kitten as the narrator. A farm kitten. This farm kitten ends up living in a house where there are 2 children. When the children fight,
"IS NOT!"
"IS TOO!"
"IS NOT!"
"IS TOO!"
"ISNOT!"
"ISTOO!"
"iSNOT!"
"iSTOO!"
.....
"S'NOT!"
"S'TOO!"
=
SNOT STEW!!!
So the cat hears the fighting at dinner, and thinks that the delicious aromas he's smelling must be...SNOT STEW!!!
gross.
Also, the cat gets his tail bitten off by a mean dog.
Iccchy.
As I said, it was a weird book. Especially for children.
tunes: DC Talk--Jesus Freak. (almost old skool).
6.5.04
I just got back from a walk with JO!
Nothing like a late night conversation to soothe one's tattered....
eh, who'm I kidding? Nothing about me was tattered. I'd just been inside watching tv for too long. And, with the absence of school comes a lack of JO! time.
tonight though, such tragedy was averted! all thanks to...
well, to me and jo.
Oops, I mean JO!
Nothing like a late night conversation to soothe one's tattered....
eh, who'm I kidding? Nothing about me was tattered. I'd just been inside watching tv for too long. And, with the absence of school comes a lack of JO! time.
tonight though, such tragedy was averted! all thanks to...
well, to me and jo.
Oops, I mean JO!
may birthdays
well, may 5 was my sister's 20th birthday.
20 years ago, in Neilburg Saskatchewan, she was born.
that was a good day.
she's a girl who I want to protect. I want to punch people who hurt her, lecture bosses who misdirect her, lay into those whose childhood woundings have left scars on her precious heart; perhaps as a way of redirecting my own guilt.
it's such a honour to watch my sisters and brother turn into such wonderful, godly, hilarious people. we're becoming friends, really.
good times.
20 years ago, in Neilburg Saskatchewan, she was born.
that was a good day.
she's a girl who I want to protect. I want to punch people who hurt her, lecture bosses who misdirect her, lay into those whose childhood woundings have left scars on her precious heart; perhaps as a way of redirecting my own guilt.
it's such a honour to watch my sisters and brother turn into such wonderful, godly, hilarious people. we're becoming friends, really.
good times.
5.5.04
3.5.04
Today started....with a slow crawl. Out of bed.
UP the stairs to breakfast...over to the couch for TV. Goooooood times.
I perused a reader's digest, settling on a story about Cougar attacks in Colorado (cheery, eh?). At the end of the story, a young man was mauled by the cat, and subsequently, killed. The description was bare, but still horrifying. What some predators can do to a person...*shudders*...
Anyway, one of this guy's friends said about his death, "It felt natural....like it was part of nature, and part of the way the cycle happens. It seemed kind of pure."
Another said it was fitting, because he was "a real outdoorsy guy."
WHAT!?
So flaky! LAME! If you ever say that about me, should I be killed by some sort of animal, I'll come back and punch you in the face!!!!!
So there.
Ha.
UP the stairs to breakfast...over to the couch for TV. Goooooood times.
I perused a reader's digest, settling on a story about Cougar attacks in Colorado (cheery, eh?). At the end of the story, a young man was mauled by the cat, and subsequently, killed. The description was bare, but still horrifying. What some predators can do to a person...*shudders*...
Anyway, one of this guy's friends said about his death, "It felt natural....like it was part of nature, and part of the way the cycle happens. It seemed kind of pure."
Another said it was fitting, because he was "a real outdoorsy guy."
WHAT!?
So flaky! LAME! If you ever say that about me, should I be killed by some sort of animal, I'll come back and punch you in the face!!!!!
So there.
Ha.
I just saw the WORST paidtvcommercial EVER.
Not everyone is meant to be monogamous.
A service for attached adults seeking new relationships. After all, we're all sexual beings. Why bother trying to communicate your spouse, when there are other people out there, wanting to try something/someone new.
We are sexual beings, and those needs must be met. Why be faithful to your marriage if you're miserable? (hmm..."for better or for worse..."). Screw the vows! This is a liberated, free choice society people!
This calls for action! Exercise your individual freedom to attain your own happiness and fulfillment!
Act NOW!
Not everyone is meant to be monogamous.
A service for attached adults seeking new relationships. After all, we're all sexual beings. Why bother trying to communicate your spouse, when there are other people out there, wanting to try something/someone new.
We are sexual beings, and those needs must be met. Why be faithful to your marriage if you're miserable? (hmm..."for better or for worse..."). Screw the vows! This is a liberated, free choice society people!
This calls for action! Exercise your individual freedom to attain your own happiness and fulfillment!
Act NOW!
1.5.04
I don't know how many of you have heard of, or read of, or listened to, Rich Mullins (note also: Brennan Manning), but NOWTV was just playing an old talk of his, and wow.
He was talking about how wonderful it is that we aren't meant to be perfect, because that would be life without living. Where there is life, there is mess.
He went on to talk about St.Peter (you know, the one who lets people into heaven? Yeah, him). Here was a man who denied Christ, who was forgiven, who preached to thousands, and still had hang-ups about gentiles. But the beauty of it is...he wasn't preaching because of his own perfection, or his self-confidence or self-belief. No. No, he preached, he spoke, he called out to the masses of people at Pentecost because of his conviction, his faith in Jesus Christ.
That's what is rocking me right now, folks.
More later.
He was talking about how wonderful it is that we aren't meant to be perfect, because that would be life without living. Where there is life, there is mess.
He went on to talk about St.Peter (you know, the one who lets people into heaven? Yeah, him). Here was a man who denied Christ, who was forgiven, who preached to thousands, and still had hang-ups about gentiles. But the beauty of it is...he wasn't preaching because of his own perfection, or his self-confidence or self-belief. No. No, he preached, he spoke, he called out to the masses of people at Pentecost because of his conviction, his faith in Jesus Christ.
That's what is rocking me right now, folks.
More later.
