I am one who cares about her friends. Some of my girls from camp who are a few years younger say I'm like a mother to them, in the sense that I can be comforting and protective, and they feel safe and cared for around me. One of my friends from dts said she loves the way I care for people I love. It meant a lot to me when she said that.

But there's this friend I have who I am getting to know...and I care about this friend a lot. A LOT. Which normally is fine...but in this case, I seem to just keep screwing up and pushing this person away...or saying and doing too much or the wrong thing...and I get pushed away.

I'm frustrated and sad. I don't mind friendships that form and develop slowly. I like them that way...it's healthy. But when...I just keep messing up...it makes me sad. *sighs*. Friend, if you read this...and you know I mean you...I am sorry. I do love you, and I do care about you...and I do not want to make you upset or discouraged. And I don't want to pressure you or make you stressed out...just to be here...but sometimes, I'm not sure how. *sighs*. I'll do better next time, I promise. Love, Melinda Joy